I’ve stayed away from blogging for the last week or so not for lack of interest, but because I was wondering if I put too much of myself out there. You know, wondering if I’m too open about my life for such a public forum. I was also wondering if my blog was starting to get too “dark” so to speak.
After my recent posts about my struggles with depression, I got a lot of emails–some disturbing and some not so much. A few were thanking me because they saw themselves in me and decided to try and get some help. For those emails, I’m truly thankful. A few others were condemming me and explained that no Christian would attempt to take their own life, they’d never have sex before marriage, and a litany of other things that made me in their words “a hideous negress”.
I’m a grown woman so I can handle criticism as it comes (especially in the form of anonymous emails) — after all, that is part of the definition of adulthood, but I did pause for a while. I wondered if I was exposing too much and perhaps opening myself and my family up to something worse than a few raucous anonymous emails. I thought, I discussed with D and my friends, and finally decided to keep on doing what I’m doing. I don’t write about my friends or D without their permission and I’m okay with putting myself out there (to a point).
I truly believe that if anything I write about or go through can help someone or make them happy, then that’s a blessing. Otherwise, it’s my corner of the blogosphere and if you hate it…deuces…if you love it, stay a while. I’m not going anywhere. My job’s insanity has kept me from posting as frequently as I’d like (and I’m really just too lazy to post from home), but I’m still here. Decision made.